Well I’ve had several weeks away from writing anything on my blog, some of it down to a bit of writers block some of it because I’ve been ill.

I’ve sat down quite a few times to restart the writing and ended up doing nothing as my mind was totally blank! I didn’t fancy just writing total rubbish so just left it when nothing was coming to me.

I’ve had a cough and a cold for just over a week now. The first couple of days were the worst, because I was quite down with having the cold it was affecting my MS. My balance was really bad and I fell onto the floor and then couldn’t’ get myself back up.

I had been trying to head to the toilet for a wee, so falling over and then not being able to get back up was not good. I suffer from urgency anyway and I guess being ill was affecting that too. Basically I was trying to crawl through to the loo, but I wasn’t quick enough and ended up having an accident. Not the first time I’ve ended up wetting myself but because I wasn’t feeling great it just made me feel really bad.

Crawling around on the floor, having no strength to get myself up was definitely not a great feeling. It kind of made me realise that this was probably what I’ve got to look forward too as my MS deteriorates. That made me feel quite down at the time, and I guess even slightly worried with how much worse my life could get!

I get more worried with what impact my deteriorating health is going to have on Hales than myself really. It’s just not fair in my opinion that Hales is having to deal with all the hurdles that are coming up because of MS. She just gets on with it though, never really complaining.

Luckily the worst of the cold was only the first couple of days, and just settled down to a normal cough and cold after that. I can deal with that, it’s when it’s causing my MS symptoms to play up that I struggle. It has dragged on a bit though, just the last bit of the cough to clear now.

Well that will do for today, at least I’ve managed to get a bit done for my blog. I’m determined to get back to getting stuff on here regular again, need to get the story more up to date anyway!

Rob

So I asked a few people to do me guest blogs. And here is the first from Hales, my wife, my very best friend and totally my soulmate!!

Back to the story.

2009 wasn’t a very good year in my opinion. For a start both of our cats we had taken over from the UK got ill. Jasper developed tumours throughout his body, they got really bad really quickly. We were told that there was no treatment that would help, basically he was just going to get worse. He wasn’t in massive pain so we wanted to give him as much time with us as possible.

We tried to keep him as comfortable as possible and give him all the love and care we could. He eventually developed a tumour in his throat and could no longer eat properly. That’s when we knew it was time to let him go. It was the hardest thing I have done in my life, I held him while the vet gave him the final injection! I’ve got tears in my eyes now just thinking about it!

We noticed Garfield was having a few problems seeing things properly so we took him to the vets too. After several tests it was discovered that he had kidney problems, and that was causing him to go blind! Again there was not much we could do but give him loads of love and attention.

Luckily he adapted to his blindness quite quickly, apart from falling in the swimming pool twice he was still getting around without too much problem. We took him to the vets regularly to have his kidneys checked and try to keep him as happy and comfortable as possible.

Along with this we also needed to move again. The exchange rate had got really bad, because of Cyprus joining the EU and changing currency to the Euro. Ended up that we were paying around €900 a month rent! Obviously we couldn’t carry on that much so we found a cheaper place to rent.

The new place was not as nice as the last one but it was still somewhere I would have never dreamed of living! So we moved in May 2009.

I also was still running my business and I found a pickup truck fairly cheap, I knew it would be cheaper to use for the business than the big car I had.

Well I think that is enough for today, I will continue this soon.

Rob

Had just over a week off from doing my blog as I travelled north to visit family. It was a quick visit but managed to see quite a few of my family while I was there.

I managed to get a cheap train ticket from Ipswich to Hull, and I had a lift home so it wasn’t too expensive a trip. Had 2 changes on the train journey, Peterborough and Doncaster. Changing at Peterborough was quite easy, not too long of a walk between platforms.

Doncaster was a nightmare! The train was a few minutes late, so I only had less than 10 minutes to change. I asked which platform I needed and was told it was platform 0, which was the furthest one to get to!

Basically I needed to go down the lift from platform 4 that I had arrived on, along the subway to platform 3b and up the lift there. All the way to the end of 3b to another lift, another short subway to platform 0 and another lift up to the platform. Apparently a good 5 minute walk, I knew it would be tight as it would definitely take me longer than others to do it.

The lift at platform 4 was ok, and a short walk to platform 3b in the subway was fine. Unfortunately the lift at 3b was not working, so there was no option but to get myself up the stairs. Got up the stairs ok, carrying my rollator so was a bit slower. Set of walking towards the end of the platform and got about 2/3rds of the way before being stopped by a woman pushing a pram. She told me she had just been to platform 0 and the train for Hull had already gone!

She had missed the train too after having to get up the stairs with her pram because of the lift being out of order. Apparently there was another train to Hull leaving in about 20 minutes from platform 4. So it was back down the stairs and along the subway, then the lift back up to the platform.

I had just sat down back on platform 4 when they announced that the train for Hull was being changed to platform 3b! So back down the lift, along the subway and up the stairs once more to platform 3b!

Obviously after all this I was totally knackered and was really happy to get seated on the train. The rest of the journey was without incident and arrived in Hull, then got picked up from the station by mother and taken to hers as I was staying there.

Stayed in Hull for a couple of days and visited some family, before returning home on the Saturday. Mother had planned on staying at mine for a week anyway, so that is why I had planned the trip around that.

Well that will do for today, I was only planning on doing a short blog anyway.

Rob

The early part of 2008 was probably some of the best times for us. I was working hard and learning a new trade at the same time. Hales was working and enjoying the peace and quiet of working from home. Our 3 cats were settled nicely into life together in the new place.

My MS was still pretty much behaving itself, the few symptoms I had were fairly mild and easy to hide. The only one a bit more obvious was that I had to go to the toilet more often, and get there quickly!

I was still doing quite a bit of scuba diving and loving every bit of it. I had bought myself a half decent underwater camera and that became the thing I enjoyed the most when diving.

I started taking loads of photos when I went diving. Of people, the sea life nd just the general scenery underwater. I even managed to persuade Martin to learn to scuba dive and got some good photos while helping Emil when he was reaching him.

I was definitely feeling quite settled back then, I didn’t’ miss being in the UK at all. I did miss my family, but I had lived away from my family for a long time anyway so it wasn’t’ too bad.

Things changed yet again in the July of 2008, Martin had to return to the UK for family reasons. We worked really well together and we had become really good friends as well. I had learnt a lot about pool maintenance from him, and had gradually gotten to know all his customers as well.

He asked me if I wanted to buy the pool cleaning side of his business from him, and even agreed to take monthly payments for it. I obviously didn’t’ have the money to buy it outright so really that was the only option for me to get the business.

Obviously I agreed to do it, and after contacting all the customers they agreed to keep me on maintaining the pools as well. It was a sad time watching my friend leave Cyprus, and also a happy but daunting time starting my own business!

We were back to not having a great deal of spare money, obviously most of it went to paying for the business. But we had enough to pay the bills and still live on.

We were also sending money back to the UK to pay for all the debt we had left behind. We had managed to arrange payment terms with all the lenders and debt management companies. We had been determined to pay everything off even though we knew it would take us several tears.

So that was basically how the rest of 2008 went. Paying for the business, paying off debts and trying to live with whatever money was left. Money was a bit tight at times, but we were both quite happy and managing.

I was obviously working quite hard, 6 or 7 days a week mostly trying to keep the business going on my own. Hales did help me with the paperwork side of things, but after it had been Martin and me doing the pools it was quite a bit of work on my own.

That will do for today, I will continue with our story soon!

Rob

I’ve probably covered most of our lives in Cyprus in previous blogs, so if I repeat stuff you have already read about I apologise. I just don’t fancy reading back through all my old stuff to see what I have and haven’t already covered.

After the first 3 months being in Cyprus we settled down to getting to enjoy our lives over there. Hales was happy being able to work from home, being able to have a coffee break in or by the side of the pool probably helped! I was learning how to properly maintain swimming pools working with Martin, plus other bits of property maintenance he needed help with.

Our 2 cats were getting settled to life there, they were both coping really well even with the extra heat. I was doing more scuba diving with Emil and thoroughly enjoying it, even got the opportunity to help him a little with teaching other’s.

With the little bit of money I was earning, and Hales wages we were managing fine. We weren’t loaded but had enough to pay the bills and live, plus we had enough to have the occasional night out as well. It was turning out that we seemed to have definitely made the right decision to try a new life in Cyprus.

My MS was still not very noticeable at that time, I had stopped taking medication when we moved over there as I would have had to pay for it. It wouldnt have been cheap and luckily stopping it didnt seem to cause any problems.

The rest of the first year we just got settled into our new lives and nothing much really happened. At the end of that first year we ended up having to move to a different villa, still in the same village but a bit bigger and definitely better.

It had 3 ensuite bedrooms, a huge balcony and a nice secluded garden. It was just round the corner from the village shop, and 5 minutes walk to the beach! That was without doubt the first of the dream homes we lived in while in Cyprus!

Obviously the rent for that place was more than the first one, but we could just about afford it and still live. I was working pretty much full time for Martin by then so we had enough money coming in.

We had acquired another cat at the first villa, we called her Cookie. She had been dumped outside the villa, obviously somebody had noticed we had cats and decided we would probably look after her. I had planned on sending her to a place I had heard stray cats were looked after, but when I heard some of the stories about the place I just couldn’t do it!

So she obviously moved with us to the new place along with our 2 boys Garfield and Jasper. They all got on great and soon settled into life together,

I think that will do for today, obviously I will continue this soon.

Rob

I was sat watching I’m a Celebrity last night and they were talking about what their fears were. Things like Spiders and Snakes and Heights, etc.

I sat there and thought to myself, what am I afraid of?! Spiders, I don’t really like them but I don’t think I am particularly afraid of them. Snakes, definitely not afraid of snakes. I’ve held snakes lots of times, and even had to deal with dangerous ones when we lived in Cyprus. Heights, again I don’t particularly like heights but I’m not afraid of them.

I used to be afraid of deep water, the thought of not knowing or being able to see what was underneath me scared me. I think that’s one of the reasons I took up scuba diving, that definitely cured me of that fear.

Ghosts, I actually don’t believe in ghosts so definitely not afraid of them. Or Aliens, never met one so nothing to be afraid of for me there.

I’m not afraid of dying, I don’t believe in religion or an afterlife. As far as I’m concerned, once you are gone that’s it!

That did make me realise that there is one thing I am actually afraid of though. The thought of Hales being left on her own when I do go!

I know it’s really selfish of me but the thought of Hales moving on from me and possibly finding love again elsewhere scares the hell out of me. I know that I am more than likely to go before Hales, and deep down I know that I will want her to carry on and be happy. But just the thought of her being with somebody else sends shivers down my spine!

I’ve told myself I’m being stupid and tried to tell myself to get over it, but it is just the way it is and I don’ think I will ever change it. As I’ve already said, I don’t believe in an afterlife so it shouldn’t really matter!

I sometimes wish that I believed there was something more, and after we have left this life we will be together eternally. But that’s not something I believe in.

I just love Hales sooo much. There are just not enough words or phrases out there to fully express how I feel about her. You can replace just about anything on your body nowadays, or lose parts of it and still survive.  But I know for a fact that I could not or even want to survive without Hales!

I’m not planning on going anywhere for a long time yet, so this is just me expressing my thoughts. I’ve got way too much fight left in me to contemplate anything happening for ages yet. You are going to have to put up with me for a lot longer!

I’ve tried to write this blog without it sounding too morbid or anything like that. I just thought I would put down some of my actual thoughts without watering them down at all. I’m a pretty open person, and not afraid to express how I really feel.

Anyway, I think that’s enough for today. Eventually I might get to writing a blog every day, but at the moment it is only when my brain is in the right gear and ready to express itself!

Rob

I was quite relieved when the house was finally sold and we had a bit of money to actually get sorted, and properly start our new lives in Cyprus.  I was also a bit sad as well.

I don’t come from a very well off background, most of my family are either in debt, living on benefits or both! That’s just the way it is, I don’t think it is anything any of my family particularly do wrong. It’s just how life is coming from Hull, most of my family do try really hard to improve their lives.

I had always dreamed of settling down, having a gorgeous wife and owning my own house! That’s exactly where I had managed to get to living in Ipswich, I had worked hard and I guess I had actually achieved that dream.

I was still young though, and obviously a little bit stupid when it came to debt. Every time somebody offered me money I would say yes please! That’s ow it spiralled out of control. We had credit cards, and when we were offered a loan to pay off the cards it seemed like a good idea. Being a bit stupid though, instead of cutting the cards up when paid off I kept them.

Of course it was then way too easy to use them again and get even more in debt! That’s ow it managed to get so bad. Use the cards then get loan to pay cards off, use the cards again and then get bigger loan to pay cards and previous loan off!

It was a vicious circle, and at the time I was obviously too naive to notice how bad it was getting before it was too late. That’s why we ended up having to sell the house, partly because I was too proud to admit defeat and go bankrupt!

In hindsight that would have been the easier option, debt would have been cleared a lot quicker than it eventually took us to clear. But we probably wouldn’t have moved to Cyprus and had 10 unforgettable years there!

So that’ why I was a bit sad at the time, because we had lost the house. I mostly blamed myself for it, I had seen it happen to people before and I should have known better. I had hoped to provide a wonderful life for Hales in our own place and give her everything she deserved. In my eyes I had failed!

But moving to Cyprus I had the opportunity to still make a fantastic life for Hales, and I was determined to do my best.

I had had MS for about 11 years when we moved out there. I kind of knew that it was going to get worse eventually, so I needed to make Hayley’s life as good as I could while I still could.

I had researched MS enough to know that I was more than likely to get worse as time went on. I dreaded the thought of being a burden on Hales, that’s definitely not what she expected to happen when we got married.

I know that she will say that it doesn’t matter and she loves me regardless. But to have to sit and watch my wife do more and more to help me is the hardest thing for me!

Anyway I seem to have gone way off the story today, so I’ll  finish this for now and try to pick up the story again next time.

Rob

Back to the story.

Luckily the house sale went through smoothly this time. It was a bit of nail biting for the next 3 months. We knew that if the sale fell through again we would have to give up on Cyprus and return to the UK.

During the week we stayed with Emil in Nicosia, and most weekends we spent in the villa on the coast. A few times we managed to get a hire car for a weekend, that gave Emil a break from running us back and forth. It also gave us chance to explore a bit more and learn what was about in the Paralimni area.

The villa we were renting was in a small place called Ayia Thekla, which is very close to Ayia Napa.  We did manage to get to know a few people living in the same area of Ayia Thekla, but with only being there weekends we didn’t really get totally settled in at the villa.

We had booked our 2 cats Garfield and Jasper, into a cattery before we left the UK. We only expected it to be for a few weeks, but with everything that happened it obviously turned into 3 months. We had to find the extra money for that as well, I think we had initially paid for 3 weeks for them.

Eventually everything went through with the house sale and we finally got completion on it. We then had to work out what we were paying off and how much money we could put aside to get established in Cyprus.

We paid the mortgage off and the 2nd secured loan we had on the house. Obviously paid the solicitor and estate agency that had sorted the sale for us. I think that left us about £10k in the bank to try to sort out any other debts we could, plus get what we needed in Cyprus.

First thing was to sort out getting our 2 cats to us, I think that alone was about £1200. Next was to get a car so we could get around, that was around £3000. We paid to get satellite internet fitted at the villa so Hales could work, that was another £1500!

Paid off a couple of small debts, I think it was overdrafts mostly. We then bought a few bits so we had everything we needed to finally get settled and established a bit better. That was about it from what was left from the house sale!

We still had a lot of outstanding debt, I think it was around £15k. We both had had credit cards, plus store cards and catalogues.  Over the next few months we managed to get in touch with them all or the debt collectors who were chasing the money, to arrange payment plans to pay them all off. That actually ended up taking us 4 or 5 years, but that’s a different story!

I had managed to make friends with a guy who lived just round the corner from us, Martin. He had his own property management company which included looking after swimming pools. He offered me a couple of days work a week helping him with doing the pools. It wasn’t a huge amount but with Hales wages it gave us enough to live on .

That will do for today, I will continue the story soon.

Rob

Still waiting for a bit of feedback so I can work out how many people are following my blogs. 😁👍

I’ve been to the gym this morning and had my first session for this week. I’m only there for about 30mins, not a huge amount of time but at least I am trying. I’m hoping to do 3 gym sessions, 1 swim and 1 yoga session during the week each week.

If I’m feeling up for it I might try to do an extra gym session or a swim over the weekend. Last week was my first full week so I wasn’t up for any more over the weekend, although I did do a little bit on my treadmill at home on Saturday.

The gym sessions might not be much, but I’ve been coming away aching more than when I got there so I must be doing some good! I will gradually try to increase what I do, but I think I will be sticking with what I am doing at the moment for a while.

I did contemplate joining some groups or other people with MS doing stuff, but I think I prefer doing things on my own and at whatever pace I want to really. That’s just the way I am though, I’m  sure other people peefer others around them when they do things.

I was exactly the same when I was a teenager, and I did long distance running. I hated training with a group of people and running at their pace. I felt more relaxed and able to run a lot better being on my own and at my own pace.

I was able to train with others though. I had to do it when I was in the army and just got on with it. Totally different though marching or running in the army, to pounding the streets training for long distance running.

I wish I could still go jogging like I used to. I would get into my own little world and jog for miles without even thinking about it back in them days. Still, life goes on and I certainly don’t dwell on the past very much now. Those days have passed never to return, all they are now are memories!

I try not to complain too much about my problems, it doesn’t do any good anyway. There are people out there dealing with much worse than I am, so how can I justify complaining about my life?!

If my attitude towards it all can inspire other people then that makes me very happy. One of my big goals in life is to be remembered. In years to come I think it would be brilliant if people can turn round and say ‘do you remember Rob? He just kept being positive and trying!’

Anyway, that will do for today

Rob